Fiona's Blog: How to keep the conversation flowing on a first date
Many people come to university single and looking for love, meaning many a first date before they find someone who they want to spend more time with. Often conversation can get awkward quickly if you don’t know what to talk about, so here are a few ideas on how to keep the talk going, even on the most awkward of dates:
- Ask a lot of questions
Everyone finds it easier to talk about themselves, and you do want to get to know this person. So take the time to come up with some core questions you want to ask beforehand that will naturally lead to a more open conversation.
Avoid questions that only require a yes or no answer or anything short. Instead of asking “What do you study”, instead ask something like “What inspired you to pick the course you are on?” This shows genuine interest and will hopefully open up the conversation. Build upon their answer, tell your own story, really listen to what they are saying and take the time to show them you are listening by responding to each vital piece on information. Doing this shows your date that you are interested in them not only on a surface level, but that you really want to get to know them.
- Read up on current events
Current events can be a great conversation starter, whether it be politics, a new film or the newest video game. Anything that is related to your similar interests will go down well, if you know you are both really into politics, speak about Brexit. Tech geeks? The newest iPhone, yes or no? There is so much going on all around us that we can speak about. Even if its just a crazy story you saw in the news about a lady climbing up a tree to get her cat, its still a great conversation starter to laugh over and share silly thing you have done in the past.
- Find out how compatible you are
This is important because not only can it be really interesting and funny, but you can also learn a lot which can save you time later down the line. Ask about their pet peeves, their guilty pleasure, their favourite music genre or fandom, whatever it is, have fun with it. Share funny stories about a weird situation you got in, find out if your humour is compatible!
- Have fun
First dates can seem daunting, but really, all it is, is you having a nice dinner (or whatever you are doing) with somebody you may or may not be compatible with. If you are yourself and you let your personality shine through, the right person will love you for exactly that. You don’t need to put on a show or be anything you are not. Relax, have a drink and take a breather, try to enjoy yourself as much as you can and if the date doesn’t go well, at least you can leave knowing you never have to see this person again!
Not everyone will be the perfect match for you, and you may have to kiss a lot of frogs before you meet your prince, but hopefully with these tips you can make even the blandest date go by slightly faster. And remember, if you aren’t having a good time, you are allowed to leave! Nobody is forcing you to stay and even though it may be awkward, you don’t need to waste your precious time with somebody you don’t enjoy being around.
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